Monday, March 23, 2009

Dude, quit kicking me in the kidney!

As I believe I have mentioned, the ugliness of the third trimester has made an appearance. With three months to go, I am frightened because I am already so very uncomfortable. Last week, my mom – who is one of the fortunate few privileged to endure a litany of my complaints over the phone – commented that at least I seem to be a good mood despite my discomfort. “Ah, yes, but you don’t see me at night,” I told her. Once Jack goes to bed, you see, I sink into a horrible funk of misery and self-pity. It is a real treat for Andrew, believe me.

Take, for example, the “round ligament pain.” Which I have. Constantly. Well, OK, only when I move. Fortunately, the round ligament pain has been easing a bit lately, as my beloved daughter has been making herself a bit more comfortable by stretching out sideways and kicking me repeatedly in the right kidney. So… yay? And then! In the wee hours of last Saturday morning, I awoke to the delightful sensation of incredible tightness in my stomach, almost as though a very small person was lying on it whilst elbowing me in the intestines.

After throwing up my dinner for an hour or so I was able to go back to sleep, but I spent Saturday lying around morosely, feeling sorry for myself and trying to determine if and what I should eat. I didn’t know if I had contracted food poisoning or a stomach bug or what, all I could tell was that I was simultaneously hungry and semi-nauseous and if I ate, I felt better, but only for five minutes.

By Saturday night, after noticing that I felt much better when I lay down, I had self-diagnosed myself with a case of “A fetus is squishing my digestive system.” Since then, I’ve had to eat tons of small meals all day long because my poor little squished stomach can’t handle normal sized portions. Although in the interest of full disclosure, I should admit that as of this writing, I think she’s shifted again and is giving my stomach and kidneys a break. Now she’s focusing on my lower back. And of course the round ligaments.

In happier news, this weekend, we totally scored two Little Tikes play houses at a yard sale for a grand total of thirty dollars, including delivery. Yes, the guy delivered them for us because they wouldn’t fit in our car. I’ve been in the market for a used Little Tikes play house for some time; I didn’t want to buy a new one, because they’re outrageously expensive and also totally indestructible, so I knew a used one would be just fine. They hose right off. I’m not thrilled that one of them is very pink, but on the other hand, I’ve heard a rumor that a little girl is coming to live here pretty soon, so maybe pink is for the best.


Becca said...

I remember my first bout with "A fetus is crushing my digestive system." It was, unfortunately, the night I decided to wolf down an Oreo Blizzard right before bed. I had about the same reaction you described. Not good.

Ugh, I hate the third trimester.

Anonymous said...

I second the "Ugh". There is just nothing more to say other than you (and esp your right kidney) have my deepest empathy.

Total score on the Little Tyke houses. I am totally envious!!!

Olivia said...

Oh the round ligament pain! I have had it off and on (mostly on) since about week 19 (I'm in week 39 now). It hits me the worst at night when I try to roll over or get out of bed. I had no idea how much inner thigh muscles are used for those actions.

As I was telling my mom about it one day she said she didn't remember experienceing that when she was pregnant. I told her she must not have had it because believe me, you would not forget severe, shooting pains in your crotch!

Whimsy said...

OH NO. You have now totally reminded me of the digestive system crushing sensation. AWFUL. It's weird how quickly we un-pregnanters forget, huh?

I am so sorry.